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The Fuel


Forgiveness is constant as I make it a habit with a dose of salt thrown over my shoulder. The man with an ambitious goal, and a jealous streak, lurking at each corner asking for information and reasons to hate, he deserves forgiveness. The woman with an annoying laugh who dislikes you and wants everything in her power to control your destiny despite your plea for her to stop and let it be, she deserves forgiveness.


I find that the more I practice even with the smaller details, it helps to lead me to forgive for the assaults, bullying, abuses and harassments. Excruciatingly difficult for me too, but the girl at the sandwich line doesn't mean for you to consume that much mayonnaise and it isn't her fault you hate white lard. Probable cause lingers in my mind of why the people who doesn't want me to have love will always try to sabotage it, but I finally let it go, and let it be, and let God. Surrendering is often the best medicine and I just don't ask for anymore harm from others by making it easier for them to hurt me. There are laws, and I am protected.


Forgiveness has to be done first even if the guilty doesn't know. I can just forgive and let them be and not be hard on myself and my conscience to cause me more anxiety. It is so fluid, and it helps me through, letting them be in the arms of God, and away from my dancing space. I forgive because I don't want anymore traumas. If I don't forgive, it is inside my chest and it lives there forever, as I become bitter and lose my tastebuds. The senseless pain doens't add up to healing or pleasure, because I become the victim once more. 


Forgiveness, an art that might take a lifetime, so I'm starting now.


Just write.


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